Grim.

When it finds you out: your bad news, your bad luck, your bad life, there's maybe a second before the pain starts when you realise all that hiding had no point. However skilled you are at tucking what you care about away, however low you lie, however trained and fine you make yourself, it doesn't matter - you are a small, soft thing and the world is full of fire and hardness and if you are scared, alert, distracted, bored with your job, the bullet hits you all the same. It doesn't mind.