Questions.

Yesterday was unusually sunny. The sun sat high above me, but usually the sun would be misleading, and to trust the existence of the sun was to radiate some warmth onto us would be its biggest trick. Normally, it would work. But yesterday was special I guess. The sun was not a lie. The ray of light that fell on my bare skin felt warm and the breezy wind that smacked my face did not feel as cold as it used to be. I was glad that I did not have to carry my heavy coat around. I was glad that I was able to walk around with just a thin layer of clothes, looking so carefree, very upbeat. No gloves, no scarf, and no socks were needed to assist the coldness, a feeling that has been accustomed to me for as long as I could remember ever since the first time my feet landed on this soil. I thought for a special day that breached from its normality, I should at least try to celebrate it.

Celebrations, hitherto are meant for something that brings happiness to the crowd, I reckon. A sign of being grateful. A thank you note to God for his blessings bestowed upon us, the lucky ones. But one thing has been discombobulating me since couple of days ago. Pieces of unsolved puzzle have been dancing on their feet, flashing their salt-and-pepper images to me. What is the truest purpose of me being here? 

The sages might constantly preaching us to live our lives to the fullest, as best as we can. Live it the way we want it to be so that when it culminates, there would not be an aching pain inside our heart with endless pinching whispers from only God knows who, telling us this specific words that have been put on an endless, long lasting repetition of 'If only, I could have, I should have.' That would be a mere sign of discontentment over the life we once had. At that exact point when God has finally decided to terminate our intangible contract, there would be no chance of turning back. That is the closure, the final grandeur of your stage performance, and you would have to bid goodbye to the audience, to the world. Your mortality.

Hence, the questions of; Why are you here? What are the purposes? What do you need to do exactly?

Unraveling all these, I think I have found the answers. I suppose. Oh I just do not want to die only to find myself filled with furiousness and regrets for the things undone, the important ones. If living my life to the fullest means summoning every possible might that I might have to get the important things done before they blow the whistle off, marking the end of everything, then I would do exactly that.  

What you sow is what you reap. What you give, you get.